Stuff

life is all about how you handle plan B
your place on the fence
judgement....
have plans not goals
fanatics and obsessives never win
money cant buy me love - but it does buy a lot
its only your truth
thers no such thing as ultruism
sometimes 80% is good enough
pick your battles
stuff
dont be your own worst enemy
not all friends are created equal
ask not what your friends can do for you
relationships trump everything
dont fall out over dead grandmas tea set
never underesitmate the importance of family
one day your granwont be here anymore
frictional encounter
you are nothing more than a bunch of memories
its ok to be mediocre
dont take your privilidge for granted
its good to know where youre going but dont forget where you came from
every silver lining has a cloud
the doos-o-meter
we cannot be sure of having somethng to live for unless we are willing to die for it. CHE
 nobody really cares if your miserable so you might as well be happy
dont believe in regret
never say never
everything in moderation, including moderation
introverts - don't be rude
extroverts -  not everyone likes roller coasters
ther are lots of valid reasons for failing but succeed, anyway
karma isnt a thing but pay it forward anyway

The Fence

Flying a banner "# Black Lives Matter " from the Ivory Tower of my White Privilege seems a little insincere. 

Neil and I moved to New Jersey 3 weeks after 911. Every single house in every single neighbourhood was adorned with American Flags and some houses literally had shrines set up in their front yards.

Every single car flew at least one flag too. 

We moved into our house and consciously decided "No Flags."

We'd lived in the country literally 24 hours and flying American flags everywhere, felt insincere. We hadn't earned that right. Flying a South African flag felt very wrong too. So we had no flags. It did not mean that we didn't care deeply about the tragedy of 911or that we didn't love our homeland. If anyone read it that way it was because they never bothered to ask us. We lived there nearly 3 years and our neighbours never really accepted us. That may have had nothing to do with the flags, of course. 

Put it another way...

I believe I have no real leg to stand on if I protest Climate Change but think I have the right to take long haul flights and drive a 4x4. Which I do. And I sincerely question your right to protest Climate Change when you chose to have 4,3,2 or even 1 kid. Which helps me justify my choice of vehicle and my love of juicy steaks.

No amount of paper straws or hemp shopping bags puts me vaguely in the right corner. 

Tim Minchin has a song..

"In defense of the Fence"  and whilst it's not a perfect explanation of my views, I know I rather be a conciderate "draad sitter" than an "insincere fanatic."

So when I don't glibbly change my profile picture to #BlackLivesMatter,

I can't stop you judging me but I'd rather you asked me why. And call me out if I Fuck Up. But not on social media platforms, please. In person is better.